Gaslight
by Scheherazade Lillith
Summary: They stuck to their promise of being in a bar when they made it to heaven, but this wasn't what they expected. Welcome to the Gaslight, come in, sit down, grab a pint of your favorite beverage, and listen to the crazy misadventures of those who cross her threshold. Shakarian, rated M for various reasons. Mass Effect is own by Bioware; I own all of the non-ME characters.
1. First Drink: Avalon

First Drink:

Avalon

Valhalla: the hall of the fallen; or more commonly known to the natives as the first place the dead go to before entering Avalon. Its white marble walls lit only by the heavenly light from outside, that filtered uniformly through the five feet tall windows that were on either side of the hall. The newly deceased passed through the golden Valkyrie-winged doors, going into scanners that detailed their life, only to make sure that they were meant to be in Avalon. Rumors were only that if you did something truly terrible, you would be sent straight to Utgard for a certain period of time, depending on crimes and misdeeds that you committed. If you survived Utgard intact, you could pass through to Avalon, which ironically enough didn't have the concept of time. If you didn't survive Utgard, then you would go to Oblivion, where your soul would eventually die and fade from existence. But this was a rarity in it of itself, so it was quite a spectacle when it would happen. After that, much like when a soul would enter the world of the living to be reborn, the memory of their death would be wiped clean. This, coupled with the lack of the concept of time, would allow the spirit to live a new life in Avalon.

Along with a new life, soul would take a new physical form. In the world of the living, or the Protectorate as the Creators knew it, there were humans, turians, quarians, asari, salarians, krogans, and so many more. Avalon was only in need of one form, uniform yet differential to each other and only one species covered that requisite: Humans. But those that lived there could tell what was what and who was who. For example, asari had varied shades of blue or purple colored hair, drells had dual-colored hair (one color on the outside, another on the inside.), turians had colored lines under their eyes, quarians and the geth (believe it or not, they really did have souls!) had grey eyes, krogans were more tribal looking and had darker skin than the other spirits, salarians were very skinny and their eyes were completely black, and humans were just humans.

Many of those that were in Valhalla were already residents of Avalon, waiting for the ones they love pass on and come to them. It was a rare time when a couple would come through the shimmering gates of Valhalla, unless they committed suicide together or they grew old and died. But as life could prove time and time again, there's first for everything.

A young woman stared, entranced, at the soft, intricate gold gates that blocked her way to the marble building. Her long raven black hair was strewn wildly and going down to her waist when unbound by elastic or plastic. Tattered were her clothes: a knitted red bolero, lacy white button-up shirt, and a black denim skirt, paired with knee high brown buckle-up boots. Eyes, wet and blue, like the salty oceans that reminded her of her home; her skin white with a slight tint of peach, her nails painted blue reminding her of someone close to her heart; she looked around, surrounded by other people making their way to the gates of the building.

"Well, here goes nothing…" She says to herself.

The woman began to make her long trek, following a rather ponderous man in front of her, which allowed her a massive space between people. Wind, light yet sweet, blew through the crowds; the bangs covering the woman's face moved and tickled the very bottom of her nose. She huffed and tried to move the stubborn strands back to their previous position. As her hand made its way down from her forehead, she looked at her nails.

"Blue, he loved blue." She softly smiles and folded her hands together in front of her.

Blowing winds continued, but this time something was different about them. A voice among the winds rushing in and out of the growing crowds of people, there was a little bit of harshness with the voice, as almost no one could tell what it was saying. Her ear perked up at the voice in the wind, what everyone thought was harsh and unbearable, was to her comforting and familiar. At first, she couldn't understand what the voice was saying, but once she made out the word said, she covered her mouth with her hand, trying to hold back a loud cry.

"Shepard!" The voice cried out, frightened, with a hint of sadness in its tone.

"I'm so sorry…" The woman quietly said.

The wind wailed for the one named Shepard again. Many of those behind the young woman turned around towards the back of the crowd. Near the back, another person, an olive-skinned man with long, messy silver hair, was screaming out among the crowd. His eyes were also blue, but he uniquely had blue lines under both of his eyes. His black tanktop fluttered in the light winds, his ripped dark grey jeans, black boots, and blue leather jacket flew up and down as jumped, trying to get someone's attention.

"Someone has to tell that idiot to shut up." One of the men, elderly and crotchety, spouted off.

"Who? Who needs to shut up?" The woman asked as she turned around to face the man.

"It's that idiot in the back that's screaming like crazy." The old man pointed his thumb behind him.

She pulled out of the group and made her way towards the end of the line, her breathing heavy as she ran violently, dodging sparse people that were in her way. He poked out his head again, roaring out the cryptic word. She wanted to take a chance, so she did, screaming out the one thing she wanted to yell out since she got here.

"Garrus!" She yelled, annoying the people next to her.

The man pokes his head out again, yells, and meanders his way out of the crowd. She screams out the name once more. He smiles and begins to run.

"Shepard!?" He called out.

She holds her arms out as he grabs her and pulls her into a tight embrace. The woman hug returned the strength of the taller man's.

"Shepard, it's really you." He whispered softly.

"Yeah, it's me, but I'm so happy to see you right now." Shepard said with relief in her voice.

They only slightly pushed each other away while he swung her to and fro, his smile lighting up a thousand golden suns. Shepard's long black hair swayed peacefully around her and Garrus' ensnared arms. She pressed her lips against his slightly scarred right cheek, to which he closed his eyes and enjoyed fully.

"Standard reunion protocol, Garrus."

"How about we mend that protocol, just this once?"

Taking his hand, Garrus grabbed the back of Shepard's head and kissed her openly, passionately; their breath escaping them with each touch of their lips. They pulled away once again, but their fingers remained interlocked as she pulled him into the crowd, in which some of them were heard cooing at the couple's intimate embrace. Shepard laid her head on her partner's shoulder and closed her eyes, enjoying the feel of his skin on his hand. Garrus leaned his head lightly over her's as he stared down at their intertwined hands, something catching his eyes.

"Blue nails?" He asked quizzically.

"Yeah, you like them?" Shepard lifted her head and looked into his bright blue eyes, which no longer had the black shade behind it.

"Hell yeah, I like them!" He smiled and laughed.

They weren't sure how long it took them to get through the crowds towards Valhalla, but it seemed that Shepard and Garrus enjoyed each other's company along the way. The couple was the next through after a rather shady looking man in front of them went through the Life Scanners. He passed through, but something was wrong at the end of the scanners. A loud, piercing siren played through the large marble building, red lights flashed all around the scanners. Two men, clad in black military-style suits, arrived almost immediately and grabbed ahold of the now angry man. He squirmed and fought back violently, shouting obscenities at his holders.

"Calm down, dammit!" One of the men ordered.

"Hold him!" The other man yelled.

The guard on the left pulled out a long black stick, which immediately became electrified as he struck the struggling man across the face. He collapsed like he was dead again.

"How many years is this one going to spend in Utgard?" The guard holding the man questioned the clerk.

"Twenty Protectorate years, the shit he did was pretty bad." The clerk finally said after a brief silence.

Shepard clutched Garrus' blue jacket tightly. _We just met up again_, she thought; _I don't want to lose him._ She crunched her eyes closed, tears sparingly falling out as she did. He looked down and gently grabbed a side of her face, lifting it up to his view.

"Hey, you've done a lot of good in your life, don't be afraid." He smiled and placed a small kiss on her lips.

After the debacle in the Scanners, Shepard was next up. She looked back at her partner, who simply winked at her for reassurance. Then she turned around and began her long saunter up the Scanners. The clerk who judged the man before her, he simply smiled at what he saw on the glowing screen before him. His frizzy red hair bounced as he shook his head up and down. As she passed through the last Scanner, there were no sirens, no red lights signifying her quick departure to the mysterious Utgard.

"Congratulations, Miss Shepard, Welcome to Avalon!" The man finally said happily.

"Really! I-I really!" She was stunned at this as she quickly remembered the event before.

She laughed excitedly and looked back at Garrus, as he gave her two thumbs up at her success. Shepard, however, quickly reserved herself as she realized that he would be up next. The red haired man cried out for him to go through. She twiddled her thumbs nervously as he made his way through the Scanners. However, like her, as he made his way to the last Scanner, he received none of the fanfare that was reserved for the worst of the worst. She smiled again as the clerk gave him a warm welcome to Avalon, and then wrapped her arms around him, burying her head into his chest.

"Ah, a couple and a unique one at that! We rarely get them coming in together now. Well, then, go to the left here get the whatever memories you have of your deaths wiped clean and then your free to go."

The death memory wipe doesn't take more than a few seconds as it was nothing more than the movement of a light wand that only removed the memory they least wanted to keep. Shepard and Garrus met up after their scans, and intertwined their fingers again. A piece of paper was handed to Garrus by a young woman who was another clerk at Valhalla. They walked through the crowds of hugging families and friends and into the bright lights of Avalon.


	2. Second Drink: Home, Bug Infested Home

Second Drink:

Home, Bug-Infested Home

"Wow, would you look at this place." Shepard said with a childlike wonderment in her eyes.

Avalon was lit up beautifully from where Shepard and Garrus could see. It was big, expansive in size, perhaps even bigger than the galaxy they once called home. A good part of Avalon's lights came from the center of Avalon, known as the Midgard District; the home for most of the humans who didn't pick the outlying Districts branched from the sprawling metropolis.

"It's beautiful." Shepard dreamily pointed out.

"Oh, I can think of something far more beautiful…" Garrus looked at Shepard as he spoke, she blushed.

"You've gotten better with your romantic skills, Garrus."

"Not quite there yet, but I'm getting close."

"So, what was written on that piece of paper you got?"

"Ah." Garrus opened the folded piece of white unlined paper. Two words were written on the crisp piece.

"Antares District?" Shepard asked confused.

"I think…that's where we're supposed to go." Garrus deducted.

He grabbed her hand and walked her down the long flight of marble steps below them. There had been two golden-haired greeters in silver tunics and grey wings at the bottom of the steps, and when the couple walked by, a resounding welcome came from the both of them. They thanked the greeters as they made their way to a small group of people crowding around a tall, thin man in a top hat.

"Come one, come all who's next?!" he heralded out.

"Where's Midgard District?" A tiny elderly woman reached out her hand, a piece of paper crinkled in it.

"Those going to Midgard, go behind me and keep going straight, Midgard's not hard to miss."

A large part of the group followed his directions and made their way into Midgard.

"Now, next!" he called out.

"Where's Einherjar District?" An olive-skinned man pointedly asked.

"You're going to go to the left and there should be a sign pointing to Einherjar. Now give me a hard one!"

"What about Antares?" The group fell silent and looked behind them.

Garrus and Shepard made their way into the thinning crowd. Their hands still locked together as everyone backed away from them.

"A human and a turian? She's seems awfully soft for Antares." He pointed at Shepard mockingly.

"I've dealt with more shit in my lifetime than you've dealt in a decade." A few 'oohs' were heard as she said this.

"Just kidding, just kidding. Now go to your right then go south and eventually you'll make it to Antares."

Those that were also going to Antares had begun to follow the couple and surround them as they walked.

"Nice comeback, girl." A man with black hair and white lines under his eyes told Shepard.

She snorted loudly at the comment as she laid her head on Garrus' shoulder once again. Most of those that decided to follow the couple looked similar to Garrus, so Shepard knew that these people were also turians in their life. Soft chatter filled the air as the group made the long trek to the fabled Antares District.

"Spirits look! We made it!" One woman, brown hair with red lines under her eyes, pointed out.

A wooden sign stating 'Antares District' could be seen under a large ivory arch; cheers resounded throughout the group. Shepard and Garrus clutched their hands even tighter at the realization that they have finally made it home.

Antares District was not nearly as sophisticated as the Midgard District. The streets themselves were paved with smooth cobblestones and were crowded by many store fronts and restaurants. There had been some high-rises, but they were used mostly for apartments. There were also homes for those that didn't want to live in an apartment, but were typically reserved for those that would have large families coming to Antares. Shepard looked up at the bright blue sky above her and Garrus.

"We're going to get into one of those high-rises, aren't we?" She asked Garrus.

"Only if you want to, but I'm cool with it either way." He said.

"How about that building right over there, huh?" She pointed at the southernmost high-rise.

It only took what seemed like a few minutes to reach the building through the winding and cloistered streets of Antares. Its outside visage was of pristine concrete and steel. It was reminiscent of the old-school hotels that still dotted Earth. The building was called the Larchmont Gardens, which was ironic because there were no actual gardens to speak of. A doorman stood outside the building, he had grey hair and yellow lines under his eyes. His suit was made of nice purple crushed velvet, a smile danced on his face. They approached him first.

"Good day, sir and madam, looking for a place to stay?" he genuinely asked.

"Yes, we are. Does this place have any free spaces?" Shepard politely inquired.

"As a matter of fact, there is plenty of space for you and your boyfriend to rent. Just go inside to talk to the manager."

He tipped his hat at the couple as they opened the glass door to the inside. The inside was clean, the red carpeting smelled of a pleasant pine tree. There was a small plastic table with a cheap metal bell on its surface, begging to be rung. Garrus slapped his hand down on the bell's circular pedal, forcing a shrill cry to come from the curved piece of graying metal. A skinny man, his hair black with orange markings under his eyes came out of room right next to the table, a bright smile plastered on to his face rather forcefully.

"Why hello! Are you looking for a place to stay?" he inquired gleefully.

"Yeah, yeah we are looking for a place to stay." Garrus said, slightly taken aback at the man's reaction.

"Well then come with me!"

The cheerful man with pinstripe navy blue suit led them to a rickety looking elevator and pressed the button denoting the fading number '16' within its circle. Garrus glared worriedly at the wooden death trap, but then he looked down at Shepard, who looked up at him, smiled, and placed her hand on his scarred cheek.

_This is for her, for us._ He thought.

He smiled back and entered the elevator with her trailing behind him. The ride itself was peaceful, the cheerful manager stayed silent as the elevator approached the sixteenth floor. Bells sounded at the arrival of each and every floor, each _ring_ meant that they were one floor closer to a permanent home, and after today, a warm bed.

One last bell signified the arrival of the long-awaited sixteenth floor. They left the elevator and entered the warm halls of the area. Four apartments were on all sides of the floor, covered with green oaken doors and bronze numbers on them.

"Ah, yes. Number 64 is vacant at this time." The jovial manager walked to the door noted '64' and unlocked it.

Apartment 64 of the Larchmont Gardens was barren save a tiny mattress in the middle of the room. It had hardwood floors, a small kitchen, and a tiled bathroom with a lion-clawed bathtub in it. Shepard immediately let go of Garrus' hand and ran over to the bed, which she jumped on playfully. She looked up at the gold-plated ceiling fan and placed her arms at the back of her head. Then she sighed sweetly and swung her legs up and down alternatively.

"Reminds me of the beds in the orphanage where I lived." Shepard stated absentmindedly.

Garrus looked at her, crestfallen; he never forgot the fact that she spent her childhood as an orphan on Earth. But she didn't crack or crumble at the thought of her early years, she found strength in it, something that he simply admired about her and soon enough, loved about her. He walked over and sat on the bed, collapsing on top of it.

"Did you have a man with scars lying next to you in the orphanage?" He inquired slyly.

"No," she bent her arm and cradled her head on it, "but I wish I did."

"So I take it you like the place?" The manager inquired.

Garrus looked back at the reclining Shepard, who giggled sweetly, and turned his attention back to the manager.

"Yes, we'll take it."

"Well, well! Stay here then," he threw a pair of keys at Garrus, "and welcome to the Gardens."

The cheerful manager walked out of apartment, and shut the door behind him. After that, Garrus immediately wrapped his arms around Shepard and kissed her full on the mouth. She returned greedily, sliding her legs around either side of her partner. Soon enough, they broke apart, the two of them just barely catching their breath as she sat up.

"I've just realized something." She said.

"What have you realized, Shepard?" He inquired, slightly irritable and aroused.

"I've never told you my first name."

"What's wrong with me calling you Shepard?" His eyes were growing dark with lust, he was losing his self-control.

"We're not on the Normandy, and we're living together now, in a sense." She lightly kissed him.

"Alright, what's your name?"

"My name is Eroika, yeah." She lightly moaned as he bit her neck gently.

"That's a pretty name."

He kissed her again, silencing her once and for all. Eroika gripped at the blue leather jacket that exposed the black tanktop and toned arms that it concealed. She slid it off of him and made a vicious attack on the pesky tanktop. Garrus on the other hand, tore off the red bolero and was making quick work on the lacy button up shirt she wore. A silky black bra was the last thing that covered her torso and it was a torture device to her turian partner, as it was always a pain to take off. He made his way to the last fastener, when something large crawled on his fingers.

_It's just her hair._ He thought as he unhooked the last fastener.

She immediately loosened her arms, which allowed him to take the torture device off all the way and revealed her soft breasts. Eroika pressed herself against his naked torso, as he removed himself from her lips and made his way down to her neck. Her breathing quickened with each of the little bites and kisses; she very nonchalantly threw her hair off of her shoulder as something tickled her. A soft hand slid down the man's torso, fingers encircling each olive-skinned muscular bump on his stomach, it stopped at the copper button that kept the dark grey jeans together. The denim buttonhole slid over the fastener, revealing the black boxers that hid quietly under them. They slid torturously off of his legs, a thin film of sweat glittered off of the toned thighs.

Her heart raced and throbbed, blocking much of the outside sounds around her. She couldn't hear the zipper on the back of her skirt begin its descent down the fabric, or the hitched groans of her boyfriend when she moved against the tent-like lump in his boxers.

"Take me." Eroika whispered into his ear.

Without a single word said, Garrus flipped her on her back as she kicked off her skirt, which was already around her ankles. He mimicked her by kicking off his jeans, and then began to kiss and fondle her breasts with extra care. She moaned loudly, grabbing the back of his head and pressed it closer to her chest. Eroika then slid her free hand down his back, took a firm grip on his buttocks and pushed them forward, eliciting a groan from them both. Meanwhile, something began to tickle the back of her left thigh, it was soft and pleasant. She laughed loudly, thinking he was causing the tickling sensation.

"Stop that, Garrus." She playfully commanded, not exactly meaning it.

"Uh, stop what?" He poked his head up, completely confused.

"Stop tickling my thigh!" The tickling sensation returned.

"That's…not me…"

Her eyes widen in sudden horror when Garrus didn't claim the feeling as his own. She slithered her left hand towards her thigh, making its ascension. Eroika's trembling hand stopped on what felt was a large rounded piece of rough plastic, segmented and moving. A tiny squeal let out of her clenched teeth as she pulled away the thick object.

"What the hell is that?!" Garrus yelled out.

Out of nowhere, a very loud scream came from Eroika. The piece of rough plastic tickling her thigh turned out to be an inch-long cockroach that had been trying to find a steady place to stay on the bed. She threw the revolting creature all the way to the other side of the room, her aroused state of mind completely gone with it.

"Oh, I hate cockroaches." A hint of disgust filtered out of her statement.

"That's what that is? I'm sorry."

He rubbed her invaded thigh very sweetly, his arousal also gone at the pest's discovery. For the first time, he felt so ashamed that he didn't take care of the big bad bug that scared his girlfriend. Eroika looked down at him, and touched his scarred cheek, to which he responded by pressing it against her delicate fingers and wrapping his hand around hers. It was their sign of comfort for the two of them, for as long as they could remember; it had been the first intimate thing she ever did for him the night before hitting the Collector Base.

He dropped down off of her and grabbed his pants off of the faded hardwood floor.

"Here, put these on." He threw the pants towards Eroika, who slipped the baggy clothing on.

Garrus also handed her back her white shirt, to which she put hastily buttoned back up. He grabbed his tanktop, slipped the flimsy fabric back on, and snatched a spare pot from the stove top.

"What are you doing?" She asked as she sat up on the mattress.

"See if there are any more of those cockroaches."

He slammed open the top cupboards first, allowing the light from the ceiling fan to illuminate the wooden holes. No detection of the creepy crawlers as far as he could see. Garrus then turned his attention to the lower cabinets under the wooden counter. As he opened the ones parallel to the oven, the sauté pans shifted slightly, and one of the dreaded bugs crawled on the walls of the pan, making its way to an opening under the charcoaled piece of metal. He knelt down, and to his horror, there were a whole nest of roaches varying in size and shape crawling and living within all of the pots and pans that were once used to cook.

"Are you alright? You've gotten quiet all the sudden." Eroika asked with a twinge of worry.

He got up and gently shut the cabinet doors on the nest and pots and pans. Regaining his composure, Garrus turned around and faced her.

"I'm going to contact the manager tomorrow and see if we could get this fixed." He didn't want her to know what he had discovered, for fear of neither of them getting any sleep.

"Come to bed, please?"

She sat with her knees bent and placed her hands between her legs. Being an orphan on Earth, Eroika could work up her blue eyes to make the biggest begging puppy dog look to get what she wanted. Garrus strangely liked this unseen side of her and thought it was cute when she would make herself look pitiful. She would always do the same thing when she would visit him down in the Normandy's main battery, trying to get him to go to her cabin and sleep with her. He would always respond the same way, he would have something to calibrate and then he would be at her beck and call in ten minutes. But now he no longer had the main battery as an excuse, nothing to calibrate, and she couldn't wait ten minutes for him to continue to hunt bugs.

"Okay, I'm coming." He walked back towards her. He needed a new response to her wants.

When he finally approached the bed, he froze, and then he gently pressed his lips against her forehead and tottered back onto the mattress.

"Lie down and scoot yourself as close to me as you possibly can."

Eroika grabbed the hanging strand of metal beads under the ceiling fan and shut the lights off. She then laid down on the bed, facing Garrus, and moved herself as closely as she could to him. She placed her head on his extended arm and kissed him on the lips one last time.

"I love you, Garrus Vakarian." She said sleepily.

"I-"he pressed her head right below his chin, "I love you, too…"

As she closed her eyes, two last words escaped her boyfriend's lips that caused her to gasp excitedly.

"…Eroika Shepard."


	3. Third Drink: Days of Our Eternal Lives

Third Drink:

Days of Our Eternal Lives

The first night changed to the second day without any more bug incidents. Sunlight of Avalon lit up the barren apartment, illuminating the cream white walls and light oak floors with an orange-yellow glow. Light brightly covered Eroika's eyes, awaking her from her sound sleep; she groaned angrily as she was torn from her dreams. She gazed irritably at the windows, and had meant shut the sparse blinds on the windows, but she had remembered that the grotesque invader from last night may still be over there. A shiver crossed down her back as she thought about the cockroach, but then she looked down at Garrus, still asleep unphased by the dawning sun. He buck snorted loudly, which caused her to giggle, but she stifled it as quickly as it came. There was something about him that was vulnerable whenever he slept, something that deeply attracted her for as long as she could remember. She bent down to give him a soft kiss on the forehead, then she made her way to the bathroom with the intent to wash the remnants of the roach's touch from her body.

The pitter-patter of shower water could be heard from the moving mattress. Garrus had begun to toss and turn, slowly waking up to find his girlfriend not there. He yawned gruffly, and then took to scratching his right side after he woke up. A sweet smell swam through the air of apartment 64, permeating through the top breeze caused by the ceiling fan. He got up from the bed, and made his way to the source of the smell, the warm steam of the shower covered him with a mist of bath water. A silhouette danced through the clouded shower curtain, feminine and goddess like in appearance. He slid his tanktop and boxers off and joined the silhouette in the shower.

Garrus stared, bewildered, at the sight before him. There stood Eroika, pushing her hands through her waist-length black hair, the sweet smell coming from the soap suds that drifted down the black highway. Her hips lightly swung side to side absentmindedly, suds dripping down her entire body. He couldn't take it anymore; he reached out, grabbed her waist, and slid his hands down to her swinging hips. She turned around violently, frightened at first, but it faded away to relief; she wrapped her arms around him.

"Don't scare me like that!" She slapped his shoulder.

"Sorry, the fragrance ensnared me, had to find out what it was."

Eroika snatched the bottle in the green wire rack hanging from the shower head. It was a small cylinder shape; the contents were reddish-pinkish, viscous in consistency, and mesmerizing in its soapy design. A basic label graced its face; its color was a very light pink.

"Berry Surprise, that's what it's called." She poured a little bit into her hand. "Do you want me to put it in your hair?"

He shook his head as she pulled him further under the shower head. His silver hair turned dark with the introduction of water; she took her handful of shampoo and squished it into his mane. Using both of her hands, she massaged the concoction into his scalp, the scent of strawberry, raspberry, and blueberry permeating his senses as she continued her assault on his messy hair. He closed his eyes as she continued to do this, hypnotized by every circular motion made by each of her fingers. Wrapping his arms around her, he pulled her close to him, latching his lips against hers gently. The suds washed away from the silver mop and made its way into the bath's drain. She used her hands and grazed them down his torso. Garrus shut off the water, but kept her there as the kissing began to deepen. His hands slid down to her naked buttocks, pressing her gently as she grabbed his hips.

A loud knock could be heard at the apartment door. It was not exactly booming, but to the apartment's occupants, it was an unnecessary distraction. The couple huffed annoyingly as soon as they heard the noise, climbing out of the lion-footed bathtub; they grabbed their clothes and hurriedly put them on. Sopping wet, Eroika and Garrus made their way to the door, large puddles trailing them as they walked. She pulled open the door and standing on the other side was the manager along with a ponderous man, who was rather hairy and scruffy.

"Hello, again; just doing an inspection, making sure everything works." He said through his smile as he looked up and down the soaked couple. "So, why are you wet?"

"The shower works just fine." Eroika pointed out. Garrus simply agreed with her.

If anything, they were more worried about the bugs in the apartment. They couldn't spend the rest of their eternal lives having to wear long clothes in hopes to prevent bugs from crawling all over them.

"Good. One last thing to check then, let's continue."

The scruffy companion crossed the threshold, and relentlessly huffed at Eroika, which earned him a cold stare by Garrus. He was far more grotesque than any of the bugs that could be flushed out of the apartment. His gray and fraying tanktop had unsightly and unknown stains covering it. His blue jeans ripped in all the wrong places, exposing things that should never see the light of day. His grey hair covered his chest, the top of his arms, and all down his back like he skinned a wooly mammoth and put it over his body. She couldn't tell if he was a turian or not, as she couldn't find the tale-tale lines under his eyes.

He shuffled towards the sink, and yanked on the cold and hot water knobs simultaneously. A rush of crisp, clean water exploded from the sink's faucet head. The ponderous man turned the sink off and grumbled incoherently as he turned his attention to the stove. He turned on each one of the four stove tops as pulled out a cigarette from his pants pocket. Using the blue-orange fire from the lower right stove top, he lit the white tip of the stick and shoved it appreciatively into his mouth. The man happily groaned and made some sort of laugh from his smoke filled mouth. Stove top off, he turned on the oven and placed his hand under the heating element of the contraption. Turning that off as well, he gave a thumbs up. He then pointed at the ceiling fan, grunting at it like he couldn't form his words.

"The lights work just fine." Garrus finally said after a long silence.

"We've got bugs in the apartment." Eroika interrupted.

The manager's eyes grew wide with disgust as he looked at the unkempt inspector. The inspector simply grunted, pulled at his falling pants, and grunted some more. Eroika and Garrus looked at each other, and then groaned irritably at their current plight.

"Where are the bugs?" The manager curiously asked.

"They're in that cabinet under the counter." Garrus pointed down at the forbidden cubby.

The grotesque man groaned as he pulled open the door, and then mumbled surprisingly at his discovery of the cockroach nest. He slammed his back against the oven door and beckoned the manager to come see what he saw. The manager, dressed that day in an orange suit, peered into the dark hole where he saw two roaches chasing each other playfully through the charcoaled pans. A slim squeal came out of him as he too was taken aback by his sights. Eroika snickered quietly at the two men on the floor, while her boyfriend simply smiled as he realized what she was doing.

"H-How did you know that there were bugs in here?" The manager sputtered out.

"When one of them crawled up my thigh when we were being…intimate." Eroika sternly said.

Inspector Makes-No-Sense tosses what looks like a small paper pad into the nest. He grumbles once more, placing both his hands around his neck, shaking his head violently, and then making a cutting motion with his hands. Laughing once more, he gets up and very politely extends his questionably clean hands down to the manager, who quickly slaps it away. The manager got up well enough by himself.

"He," the manager pointed at the nasty man, scratching his backside, "has put a roach poison in there."

"Thank you." The couple said in unison, and they both refused to shake the inspector's hand.

As the manager followed the inspector out of the apartment, he very suddenly stood up straight and turned around to face the couple. He pulled out a small envelope and handed it directly to Eroika, who took it gladly.

"This was sent for the two of you this morning." He simply said.

They gave their thanks to the man as he smiled and turned away from them. Garrus grabbed the agape door and shut it tightly, then locking it. He turned his attention back to Eroika, who was staring at the envelope intently.

"Who's it from?" He asked as he wrapped his arms around her.

"I don't know."

Eroika forced her finger to travel across the back of the envelope, breaking the sticky seal that hid its contents. A piece of light blue stationary was in the envelope, folded neatly, and taken with the greatest of care as to not to be ruined. She pulled out the paper and read it aloud:

_Shepard,_

_I have used my contacts to find that you and Garrus have made it. Wondering if maybe neither of you is busy, you could visit me in the Aquatos District tonight. I have spent my time trying to make a proper place for myself; I figured it would be nice to have friends over for once._

_I will await you tonight,_

_Thane_

_P.S.: Aquatos is only accessible by bathysphere; I have enclosed two passes you can use tonight._

Two sepia colored tickets fell out onto Eroika's hand, each one for the mysterious bathysphere. Garrus raised both of his eyebrows in surprise.

"So, our anti-social assassin wants us to visit?" He finally asked. "Whacked his head too hard?"

"Don't call him that, and yes, I mean, no. Aw, crap."

"We have absolutely nothing to wear, Eroika." Garrus pointed out.

"Yeah, get dressed; we're bound to find something, somewhere."

The fresh air had been a welcome change from the stuffiness of the air in the Larchmont Gardens. Light brought an unexpected shimmer down on the cobblestone roads they walked down as they tried to make their way through the various degrees of crowding that was an essential part of the area. They stopped at various storefronts as they tried to look for one that sold clothes. There had been some places that did, but nothing that truly caught their eye.

It wasn't until they made it to a junky looking storefront twenty minutes away from their home. A sign out front simply said: 'Pawley's Clothes'. They entered the tin shack and were more than astonished at the expansiveness of the store. On the right were ready-made men's clothes, on the left were ready-made women's clothes, and towards the back were children's clothes and shoes. Eroika and Garrus were approached by a middle-age woman, her hair slightly graying and with purple lines under her eyes.

"Hello, are you looking for something, today?" She spoke in a kindly voice.

"Yes, we're visiting friends in Aquatos tonight, do you have anything?" Eroika inquired.

"Do I have anything?" She laughed jovially. "I have everything you need. My daughter, Matilda, can help you, my dear. And my husband, Pawley, can help you, sir."

A young woman, popped out from the back, her grey hair long and flowing as she made her debut. She jaunted up to her mother and bowed her head in front of the couple.

"Do you need me, mother?" She asked with a soft voice.

"Yes, I need you to fit her in a dress for tonight, dear, for Aquatos you see."

"Very well, come with me, please." She took Eroika by the arm and started to lead her away.

"Where's your father?" The kindly mother inquired.

"Drunk and stumbling as usual."

The mother let out a ragged sigh, placing her head in her right hand. She looked back up at Garrus and smiled again, not allowing current circumstances to bring her down.

"PAWLEY! Get out here! You have business to attend to!" She screamed irritably. Her tone suddenly changed once more. "It seems that I will have to help you too." She sighed again.

An older man stumbled down the stairs that lead to the front of the store. His face, ragged by all means, twisted the wrinkled skin into a toothless smile. A waddle had formed right below his jawline and it jiggled actively no matter what he did.

"Hello? D-do you n-need m-m-my help?" His breath was thick with the smell of pungent liquor.

"Ugh, you smell like a brewery!" His wife held her nose shut and waved her hand feverishly.

The ghastly smell of stagnant beer and cheap wine whacked Garrus like he had been tackled by a krogan in blood rage. Worry appeared across his face as he looked down the old man's outfit. It was untidy by all means, mismatched colors on top (purple, orange, and green, really?), zipper undone on the too short dress pants, mismatched socks, and two sizes too big brown leather shoes; an altogether fashion mess. Garrus flew to the deepest part of his mind at the moment.

_Eroika would never forgive me if I came out looking like that, _he thought, _and Thane, he would tear me to shreds, get her to agree with him, and then she choose to spend the rest of her eternal life with him._

For the longest time, he never fully understood why he thought this way. He just kind of figured that someone like the great Commander Eroika Shepard, Savior of the Citadel and the entire galaxy would never be attracted to him; failed C-Sec agent, failed vigilante, failed…everything. He always thought she would be with someone like Kaidan or Jacob or Thane, but not him, never him. But he was happy in the end that she chose to be with him, that he could have someone that didn't care that he wasn't great at everything and could stand by his side when tried.

A tap on his shoulder brought Garrus back to the here and now. Pawley rummaged through one of racks of men's clothes as his wife stood beside the silver-haired man. The old drunk man pulled out a neatly pressed cotton dress shirt, white in color and about the right size for him. He raised the shirt up to the young man and gave an approving thumb up to his wife.

"Oh, that looks smart on you, yes." She pointed out happily.

The old man then pulled out a silk blue vest with a pinstripe design, a black tweed dress jacket, black dress pants, a sky blue tie, and some shiny black shoes. The old couple placed the entire ensemble together in the air, allowing an invisible being to serve as the model to the suit. It was sophisticated, but yet it was uniquely _him_.

"T-there's an f-f-fittin' room f-for men on the l-left over there." He pointed his large sausage finger to the opening on the other side of wall.

Garrus walked through the racks towards the fitting room, the old drunkard following him, clothes in hand, tripping over some of the racks as he continued on. Some minutes passed when the men returned from the room, one of them dressed very smartly and the other one not so much.

"Oh, you look brilliant!" Pawley's wife clasped her hands together in joy.

"Yeah, you do look really good." A woman's voice came out of nowhere.

The now smartly dressed Garrus turned his attention to the opening of the women's fitting room, there stood Eroika, dressed in a glittering blue sleeveless cheongsam with dragons and clouds stitched across the exotic fabric. Her long black hair was done up in messy bun, with decorative hair pins and a miniature Chinese paper umbrella.

"Wow…you look beautiful." Garrus' mouth was agape with astonishment as she walked down the couple of steps under the opening.

"Couldn't have said it better myself; you've outdone yourself again, Matilda." The wife interjected.

Matilda bowed her head to everyone and returned to the back room to continue to her previous work. Pawley looked up and down Eroika, admiring her new look and laughing at some unsaid joke amongst those still sober.

"Y-you look v-v-very p-pretty." He finally stuttered out.

She whispered thank you to the drunkard, and was more than a little stunned when she was told that he helped dress Garrus. She then put her old clothes in his shoe box which also had his old clothes stored in them.

"You still have the bathysphere tickets?" Eroika inquired.

"Yeah," he dug through his jean pockets and pulled out the two sepia colored pieces of paper, "there they are." He then fanned them out.

"Well, we still have time," she smiled sweetly, "why don't you and I go out to lunch?"

"Why not, I'm game."

Garrus turned towards the old couple and tried to see if he had something to give them in return. The wife raised her hand up to stop him.

"You pay for nothing up here, dear." The old drunkard began to make his way back to the store's back room. "But, I will give you recommendation of where not to go for lunch."

"Oh, d-don't go harpin' on t-the bar again!" Pawley pleaded with her.

"Don't go to the Gaslight, there food is…less than satisfactory." She tried to work up a wry smile. "Meaning that you have to end up like my husband in order to consume it."

A loud thump could be heard coming from the back room stairs. Pawley's wife turned around and groaned, shutting her eyes in complete embarrassment. Pawley had succeeded in crawling up two of the steps, then tripped and fell on the third step, slamming his entire body on the floor.

"If you're planning to travel by bathysphere, it is not recommended to be drunk when you do, unless you plan to wear your clothes only once."

Eroika and Garrus nodded their heads in agreement and briefly turned their attention back onto the fallen man, who had now shouted a loud obscenity to the sky. His wife gave her goodbyes and began to help her husband get up off the ground.

"I do recommend the Tiger's Eye Café, its right across from here." Pawley's wife smiled on last time, and then she grunted loudly as struggled to get Pawley off of the floor.

They walked out of the clothing bazaar, and into the now very active and noisy streets of Antares. Across the way to the store, there stood a prominent wood sign with a large tiger's eye depicted on it.

The couple spent an hour or two at the tiny café, having for once in their lives, a proper date. They found out from one of the long-time natives that the bathysphere station is near to the right of Valhalla, within a tunnel that crawled down to a large river of water.

When they made it to the station, there were a group of five or six copper-colored spheres with small circular windows bouncing up and down in the wavy water. At the actual loading dock, the spheres would stop bouncing and stand perfectly still as passengers were loaded on to the unique water craft. Then the metal behemoths would then descend under water and go straight to the sandy islands of the Aquatos District. Eroika was more than excited to try out the spheres, but Garrus was a little more than afraid of the contraption.

"What if it breaks and overflows with water, I can't swim damn it!" He freaked out.

"Hey," Eroika placed her hand on Garrus' scarred cheek, "everything's going to be fine. Besides, we're already dead."

A calming huff fell from the ex-turian's lips, no more freaking out for the time being.


	4. Fourth Drink: Aquatos

Fourth Drink:

Aquatos

Aquatos District was filled with a ton of beautiful beaches, and the buildings were very beach resort-esque. There were large palm trees to welcome the newly arrived deceased along with two lovely women with colorful leis on other side of the boardwalk where the bathyspheres would park themselves.

When Eroika and Garrus stepped out of the copper sphere, they were bum rushed by the two greeters of Aquatos. About ten or fifteen leis had been thrown around their necks when the beautiful greeters had finally left them alone. They sauntered across the boardwalk, hand in hand in hopes of finding where the 'anti-social assassin' lived in the beach resort world. The couple scurried around and asked locals to see if anyone knew where he lived, but it wasn't until they met up with a literal beach bum that they had gotten their answer.

"The Catalina Maria, that's where I saw him, missus." The bum gruffly said.

The Catalina Maria was exquisite, if it were in the world of the living, only the rich could enter her doors for the night. It had a natural glow, and practically served as a sun for those living in Aquatos. Its insides were covered in refreshing frescoes and its floors were filled with ocean colored mosaics, and glowed with the golden inlaid that bordered everything. The warmth of the apartments and the sweet smell of the salty sea mixed in harmony as the glass doors were opened and the smartly dressed couple walked through.

Eroika spun around gazing at the marvelous sights above her. Garrus whistled loudly at his amazement of the extravagant place, which resounded throughout the less than full lobby; then he threw both of their leis in to a nearby trash can.

"Hmm, I recognize that whistle anywhere." A rough voice softly said from the gilded benches on the right of the couple.

The man got up from the bench and placed both of his hands behind his back. His emerald green and ruby red hair glowed in the light of the lobby, his dress shirt, crisp and heather grey, his pants, a soft dark grey that fitted him perfectly. He smiled, spreading his thick lips across his face.

"It's good to see you again, Commander Shepard." The man extends his hand towards Eroika.

"Good to see you too, Thane." She grabbed his hand and firmly shook it.

"And what am I?" Garrus interrupted. "Skewered varren?"

"I don't remember getting into a fist fight with a skewered varren on the Normandy, but there's a first time for anything, I suppose." Thane replied sharply.

The fist fight on the Normandy was just for practice between Garrus and Thane. It had been a good way for Thane to get his recommended physical exercise and it gave a chance for Garrus to leave the main battery for a little while. However, it ended in a stalemate and Eroika had been called in to force a tiebreaker. Her tiebreaker resulted in Garrus being up in her cabin for three hours and he only returned to tell Thane that he won their little fight. He understood, of course, that he fought the commander's lover so she would be just a little biased about who won. Thane and Eroika were good friends, while he and Garrus were nothing more than acquaintances, but he would defend the turian because he was with Eroika.

"You know, you can call me Eroika. It's not Commander Shepard anymore."

"Very well, although should I also refer to you as Mrs. Vakarian yet, or is that too soon?" Thane inquired.

"As much as I would like to be called Mrs. Vakarian," Eroika stared at the side of Garrus' face, "the first name stays the same."

"Well, seems she's given you an assignment, Garrus."

"I'm sure I'm up to it." He smirked as he tapped Thane's shoulder.

The ex-drell beckoned them towards the golden doors of the swanky elevator. With a single push of a button, the gold barriers slid open; pristine oak panels and gold handles that stretched over each wall of the elevator, mirrors above and swirling marble tiles below, it was all fitting for the setting around them. The trio stepped in the beautiful box, which Thane shoved his arm between Eroika and Garrus and pushed the button with the number '12' on it. The ride was silent, unlike the elevator that they had slowly gotten used to in the Larchmont Gardens; it also didn't feel like it will fall many stories every time it carried someone up.

"How the hell do you live in such splendor like this, Thane?" Garrus asked, breaking the brief silence.

"What? Where you live; you do not live like how I do?"

That one question silenced Garrus for the most part. He didn't risk embarrassing himself or Eroika by spouting off that he lives in an apartment with one bed in the middle of the room, and roaches having a field day whenever they're around. He knew that they had deserved better, that Eroika deserved better, but at this very moment, when the dings sounding off the arrival of another floor, he didn't know how to provide such a thing. One last ding and there was the twelfth floor, everyone stepped off and pressed their feet into the lush carpeting that covered the floor.

"Mine is the door at the end of the hall, if you would follow me."

Thane walked down the straight corridor in front of them. The walls of the twelfth floor had been covered with artwork depicting water, beaches, and luxurious times to be had. Clean paint was a shade of warm yellow, cascading down the halls and doors like a light sand storm. Shimmering torch-shaped lights lit up the hallway, its ambiance ocean-like and romantic. There was only one door at the end of the path; Thane quickly pulled out his keys, slid them into the elongated doorknob, and opened the yellow door.

They all stepped inside, and were it an inside to be treasured. It had been almost torn out from one of those home and garden magazines and placed in front of their eyes. Sophisticated furniture of varying shades of white and gold were strategically placed in the living room. The kitchen had been well-stocked and cleaned and kept; it had been more than ready to entertain any future guests.

"This is my home, go ahead and make yourselves comfortable."

Garrus and Eroika sat down in a creamy white couch that encompassed one wall and at least the half of another wall. He had a balcony, looking out at all of Aquatos and its sparkling oceans. There were a couple of golden lights that stood vigilant over a yellow upholstered chair and a small bookcase that stood beside everything. The couple on the couch curled up against each other, enjoying the warmth and light that covered them.

"One of my neighbors gave me some wine as a homecoming gift. Care to have some?"

Thane had walked back into the room; in his hand was an emerald green bottle, a dark purple liquid swishing in it.

"Of course, Thane, thank you." Eroika said.

"Should I grab some glasses for you, or do you have it?" Garrus offered.

"There's three wine glasses in one of the upper cabinets, thanks for your offer." Thane had begun to struggle pulling out the pesky cork that had been carelessly shoved into the thin neck of the bottle.

Garrus had gotten up from his cushy seat and walked into the medium-sized kitchen, there were at least four upper cabinets above Thane. He was confused, and he quickly showed his confusion to his host.

"Where did they put them, ah," Thane paused if only for a moment, "check the third cabinet on my right."

The guest opened the cherry wood door of the cabinet, and lo and behold, there stood three crystal wine glasses ready to be used. He pulled them out of their temporary sanctuary very gently and placed it on the marble counters to the other side of him. This of course was a good idea as a large pop came from the now uncorked wine bottle and Thane flung his arm out of the way.

"About time." Garrus chuckled quietly at this comment.

"Thane, have you ever tried to pull a cork out of one of those messed up wine bottles from the Citadel? Took me almost a half an hour to pry one open when I was with Eroika, we ended up having sex and then having the wine after."

"Although it may not look like it, Garrus, I was always partial to a screwtop bottle, now I see why."

Thane switched places with Garrus and poured the dark, pungent liquid into each of the glasses, until they were half-filled with the stuff. The silver-haired guest grabbed the thin neck of two of the classes and walked out of the kitchen and made his way towards his waiting lady. She gratefully took the glass from him and swirled it around, allowing air to pass through the liquor. Thane quietly took his glass and joined them, sitting on the yellow chair surrounded by standing lights.

"If you don't mind my asking," started Eroika, "where's Irikah? I thought she would be with you?"

"She-"Thane took a big swig from his glass, "She does not live with me."

"Whoa, who's Irikah?" Garrus asked Eroika.

"Irikah is his wife, Garrus." He shook his head in quick understanding. "Why doesn't she live with you?"

"I had visited her when I first got here, but-"he cleared his throat, "she would not forgive me for leaving Kolyat behind and tracking down her killers. She believes that I had abandoned my duties in order to reclaim my pride."

"That's not true and you know that, Thane." Eroika pointed out.

"Maybe so, Eroika, but her mind I had abandoned our son. But after she said her peace, she slammed the door in my face and I've been living by myself ever since."

"My father had spent long hours when he worked for C-Sec, but my mother never thought that he abandoned my sister and me." Garrus quietly said.

"Your father is lucky. But that is the way it is for me right now, there's no fixing that. So how about you two, how have you been getting on?"

"We've been living together; it's been a lot of fun." Eroika and Garrus turned their attention towards each other, they smiled at the other.

"I suspect you would have, the two of you have been practically inseparable since both of your feelings have been made known."

Out of nowhere, the door made a loud knocking sound. Thane huffed, annoyed at the unknown intruder of their conversation. He got up from his seat and made his way towards the front door. A barely noticeable squeak came from the door.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Thane whispered at the young man standing before him.

"I-I got kicked out of the Consensus, again." The young man replied.

"How many times has this been? Three or four, or is there more?"

"This is my fourth time getting kicked out. Can I stay here tonight?"

"Fine, but I have company. Come on in."

The door slammed behind the young man, who had already made his way towards the living room. He gazed at the couple sitting on the white couch. His white hair framed his face and barely covered his eyes when he let his hood down, which came from his shortly cut hoodie. His clothes were mostly white but with interwoven black lines around the white fabric. His eyes were stark light grey, and a small smile swept across his face as he realized who he was looking at.

"Shepard-Commander, is that you?" Eroika got up from her seat, completely astonished.

"Legion, I don't believe it, it is you!"

She embraced him tightly and Legion returned it. He waived his hand at Garrus, who returned the same wave.

"It's good to see you Legion." He finally said.

"Creator Tali'Zorah was right, the geth do have souls." Legion smiled again.

"Take a seat, Legion, do you want anything to drink?" Thane asked as he reentered the room.

"I do not drink, surely you know this; but I will take a seat and enjoy the company of friends."

Legion sat down on the cushion right next to Eroika and made small conversation with them as Thane got himself comfy once again.

"So?" Thane asked.

"What?" Legion retorted back.

"What did you do this time to get yourself kicked out of the Consensus?"

"I spoke to the Creators again. The Consensus does not like that."

"Why am I not surprised?" Thane crushed his eyes close, frustrated.

Garrus and Eroika stayed for at least a long time, enjoying conversation with Thane and Legion, well, more like watching the two of them bicker about Legion's current infraction against the Consensus. Noticing that their host was growing tired, they quietly bowed out and gave their gracious thanks to Thane as they left for the bathyspheres that would take them home. Right when they made it to the front door, Legion embraced the two of them and gave his goodbyes. It had at least been another long period of time before the couple made their way back home.

Their bed, which was still in the middle of the room, had been a welcome sight for the most part. They quickly got out of their clothes, most of which was folded neatly and placed on the kitchen counter. Garrus threw his blue dress shirt on the floor, on which Eroika picked up and began to put it on.

"Eroika, I've been in that shirt most of the day, it must smell terrible." Garrus scolded.

"It doesn't smell bad," She stuck her tongue out; "it smells just like you."

She slid the dress shirt on and buttoned it up haphazardly. Where her curves were most prominent, the large shirt gathered up on, enhancing them even further. Garrus had been reduced to black boxers and a white undershirt when he made his way on to the bed. Eroika followed suit and crawled up against her lover, tucking her arms in between the two of them. They were too tired to speak of their revelations that they received from their visit with Thane. Sleep captured them in only a matter of moments.

It was pushing towards what could possibly be early morning when something tickled the top of Garrus' fingers. His blue eyes flickered open and faced the tickled hand, which found its way onto Eroika's leg. Something large had made its way on the fingers, closer inspection of the moving creature revealed it to be another bothersome roach, but this one was slightly smaller than the previous one. He grabbed it with the tips of his fingers and walked towards the stove area of the apartment. He dug around the drawers next to the stovetop, a conveniently placed box of sandwich bags had been placed into the second drawer. Garrus took one of the clear plastic bags, opened it, and threw the roach inside it. He sealed it up quickly and placed the bag on the countertop.

Eroika murmured underneath her breath and switched to her other side. He soon joined her back on the bed when all things are said and done. Garrus wrapped his arms around her body very tightly and pulled her close to him, his lips nearing her ears as he pushed his warm breath over it.

"We can't keep living like this. I have to get you out of here, come hell or high water."

His resolve and promise affirmed as sleep overtook him once more.


End file.
